Movie Review – Skyline (2010)
by HELEN GEIB
Do NOT see Skyline.
You have been warned.
How bad is it?
Let me count the ways.
Starting with its abject unoriginality.
It’s War of the Worlds, District 9, Alien et seq., Independence Day, Cloverfield and Predator 2.
Just for starters.
Except the characters are uninteresting.
(The men posture; the women whine.)
The acting is flat.
The effects look cheap.
Oh, do the effects look cheap, even the tentacled, slimy, rampaging, super-strong, brain-sucking, fluorescent aliens look cheap.
Even the set looks cheap.
(Please note the singular.)
That’s the penthouse of a major recording artist (or whatever he’s supposed to be)?
Plus the whole movie makes no sense whatsoever.
Really, what is it with the brain-sucking?
The aliens use human brains in their bio-engineered selves?
How did they develop the advanced technology currently allowing them to annihilate humanity?
How did they develop as a species in the first place if they don’t have brains?
(I could make a crack about something else missing a brain, but I’ll refrain….)
I’ve already given the premise more thought than the screenwriting team.
This is the boringest movie I’ve seen in a very long time.
It’s even worse than 10,000 B.C.
10,000 B.C. had woolly mammoths.
Pacing, you ask?
The movie has the flow of this review.
The movie doesn’t rhyme either.
Can it be a poem if it doesn’t rhyme?
The movie will make you ask the big questions too.
Like, why am I here?
Seriously, don’t see Skyline.
At least not before the Rifftrax edition comes out.